Wednesday, August 1, 2007

Human arrogance in the face of squid

This guy has never seen a monster movie.

This won't end well.

The Humboldt squid -- a creature, much smaller than the giant squid but just as ferocious, that traditionally prowls the Pacific coasts of Mexico and South America -- has expanded its domain to California's Monterey Bay.

Admittedly, this leaves humans near the bay with few good options -- a complete evacuation of the area isn't practical; neither is making peace with the beasts, since all they know is violence.

But if people in the area hope to coexist with these monsters, they'll have to resist the urge to help tourists catch them for 75 bucks an outing. If I've learned anything from Peter Benchley, it's this: Cephalopods may not understand compassion or cooperation, but they do understand the hubris of man -- and it makes them furious. (Or, if you prefer to think of killer squid as beyond emotion, an alternate explanation for their choice of prey would be that they have a finely tuned sense of poetic justice.)

Commercial fishermen who still think they're safe from the Humboldt would do well to read this article. Key passage:

“It was a clear starry night in October years ago. My father and I were fishing for calamar gigante. The squid were unusually large this night, nearly as big as a man. My father said we must be careful of the Diablo Rojo this night. These are the giant squid, the Demons. When the squid reach this size, they are no longer just squid, but become demons … killers of men.

After some time of fishing we had many big squid in our boat and started back for land. As we began our journey home I saw a Panga ahead so we went to see who it was. As we neared the Panga I noticed no one was on board and it was adrift. Concerned, we pulled along side to find out who's Panga it was. I boarded the drifting Panga and found it was nearly full of still dying calamar. It was then I noticed something strange on the side of the boat. As I looked closer, I noticed human fingernails were embedded into the wooden edge of the side rail. Traces of blood outlined a man's handprint. The terror of what happened hit me.

Will we ever learn?


jimmy said...

LOOOL. Those guys are dicked.

Andrew said...

Just bizarre, Donn.

Phil said...

Giant Squid takes 'Us Weekly' to task.

Justin said...

Where do you find this stuff, Don?

Manfred Mansel said...

fuck; we're fucked.